My day keeps getting ruined before it even starts and I don't know how to deal with it. Like the only thing I've got going for me right now is setting aside a day for self-care, simple shit like taking a full shower, trimming my nails, wearing my good clothes, and playing vidya while enjoying my favorite food. But if something goes wrong that day, usually something stupid that eats up several hours of my day, then I lose all desire to enjoy anything, because I don't want to associate it with bad memories, and I hate half-assing the things that I enjoy. I've even gone as far as to skip meals lately, which just makes me more irritable. I've been trying hard not to let anyone down, I haven't been neglecting the things that need to get done everyday, but when I see almost everyone else get time to themselves, it's hard not to get frustrated and resentful. I can't even vent at home, because everyone has to turn it into a competition.