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Everyday, I want to die Bakanon 10/05/2021 (Tue) 19:38:39 No. 2837
>19 years old >black female (please no racism; I’m not ghetto or ratchet, and I don’t act like a stereotype) >no social skills; since I’ve started school when I was four years old, I’ve always been treated like an alien/an outcast pariah and never included in friend groups >I have a dead end job I’m about to quit so I can go to college, but I still don’t know what to major in and I don’t know what jobs I don’t have to stand more than 30 minutes at a time for scoliosis. I’ve tried online jobs, but I’ve had no success in being hired. >I want to pay my parents back, pay college debts, and become a hikikomori with my cat. >I feel extremely unloved because I’m unlovable and always have been. Peers, strangers, and teachers have thought I was mentally retarded with Down syndrome in school and would make fun of me constantly. It was just verbal bullying with a few physical mishaps like pushing and tripping, but it’s still giving me issues mentally (lifelong most likely).
>teachers have thought I was mentally retarded with Down syndrome Are you?
>>2838 No, that’s the thing: I have no mental deficiencies. I don’t even look like it.
>>2837 You might feel better and have an easier time in college if you are able to pick an actually interesting major that isn't completely useless.
>>2840 I’m thinking of computer science, information technology, or database administration.
>>2841 Are you actually interested in those?
You're young. Like, really young, I actually question how you managed to find your way onto a splinter site of a splinter site for disgruntled oldfags. You're a woman, not a white woman so your pussy pass isn't the deluxe version, but you still got it. Hardly anyone knows what they want to specialize in for the rest of their life. Go over your options and group order them from least to most soul crushing. Everyone wants to be a NEET, whoring lifespan for continued living sucks. NEET life sucks too when everyone disdains you. The only way to be loved is to find love, avoid the Chad Thundercocks since they don't value women when pussy is thrown at them. Try to find a guy while you're still young since women's value drops a lot faster than men's does. There's always the option of finding a simp at 25+, but you'll have high odds of him being a bitter passive aggressive cunt with extra emphasis on passive. Teachers are retards that have spent their childhood in school, their teenhood in school, and went on to continue the trend into adulthood. Spending a lifetime in a training center rather than putting training to work makes dumbfucks. Kids are assholes because they have no reason not to be and nothing better to do.
There are black women here? Today I learned.
>>2843 Thank you for the life advice. The pussy pass thing… that was… a pretty weird thing to say anyway. Otherwise, thanks.
>>2844 I didn’t know black women were an anomaly here.
Is there anything you like doing?
>>2847 I like technology and gaming, so I might study computer science or computer engineering or game testing. Otherwise, I like writing to become a novelist or becoming a photographer.
>>2848 >>2847 I forgot to mention that I’ve been studying Japanese for 12 years, and becoming a translator could be an option as well.
>>2849 >七歳の時から日本語を学んでる マジっすか。アクセントはどう?幼い頃から学んでるなら大人になってからはじめた人よりいい気がするが実際は? それともインターネットで嘘を吐いてんの?
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>>2837 >I have a dead end job I’m about to quit so I can go to college, but I still don’t know what to major in and I don’t know what jobs I don’t have to stand more than 30 minutes at a time for scoliosis. I’ve tried online jobs, but I’ve had no success in being hired. Study something related to your current job (like management or accounting if you are a cashier or mcdonalds cook) so you can advance a little in the waggie chain. You'll still end in a shit job, but you'll have the opportunity to make it less shit by becoming a waggie wrangler (aka manager) or to a less depressing position. It'll also open you more opportunities to be a wageslave in a less physically intensive area, and maybe even give you a feeling of accomplishment. Just don't go to an expensive university, community college (or whatever they are called in your country) is enough until you decide what to do with your life. >>2848 Here's a tip from a former neet who fell for the computer science meme and lost 3 years achieving nothing: DON'T study CS, software, programming and similar shit if your only ties with tech are shitposting online, playing games and dreaming of making your own game, because you'll fail miserably once you have to program something. It happened to me and 9/10 of my class, and will happen to anyone who doesn't already know how to design a plan in their head and translate it to code.
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>>2837 >I have a dead end job I’m about to quit so I can go to college, but I still don’t know what to major in The most important thing I can stress is to have a plan that you want to complete, otherwise you'll either not complete whatever career track you choose or you'll lose interest and drop out halfway through. I made the mistake of just going to college expecting to "figure it out" and by my third year I still had no idea what sort of degree I was looking for. Spend time reflecting on yourself and figuring out what you would actually want to learn and work, don't be afraid to talk to college advisors, maybe even spend time talking to people in certain positions to see how they compare to what you/they expected. Also if possible keep a part-time position somewhere as a fallback, even if it's something absolutely entry-level like a day or two doing inventory at a bookstore. Having continued employment that you can rely on if things don't go the way you hope is a good idea. >and I don’t know what jobs I don’t have to stand more than 30 minutes at a time for scoliosis. I’ve tried online jobs, but I’ve had no success in being hired. You could look for smaller office-type jobs, even stuff like administrative stuff at stores, IT/tech support, possibly accounting if you're looking at that field. One benefit to being young is no matter how shit you think you are with computers, you're ten times better with them than the boomers who'll hire you.If you are interested in IT, something in computer science would be a good start since it's both applicable to a lot of other fields and strong on its own as a background. Your problems have become very common ones in today's world so first off I'd say try not to let these things get to your head. As has also been mentioned, you're still very young (even if you don't feel like it) and you have a massive number of options available to you. I do want to ask though, which of your problems hurts you the most? They're all issues worth tackling but understanding the root of what's causing you grief is key to fixing most (if not all) of them. >>2844 Unironically, imageboards and some other similar sites are the most diverse places on the internet. >>2851
>>2851 本当に。嘘つきじゃない。まだペラペラじゃないと思うけど。2010年のほとんどは、7歳だった。9月2010年に、8歳になった。
>>2848 >>2849 Have you ever looked into repairing? It could be a fun learning side gig as long as you know what you're doing
>>2849 >I’ve been studying Japanese for 12 years Whatever you do you should translate on the side and invest or save the profits. It's always good to have a nest egg or assets you can liquidize when shit goes south. >>2855 >One benefit to being young is no matter how shit you think you are with computers, you're ten times better with them than the boomers who'll hire you Anon, that time has past us. Phones have corrupted zoomers. https://archive.ph/2021.09.23-183214/https:/www.theverge.com/22684730/students-file-folder-directory-structure-education-gen-z
>>2844 A lot of 8moe's users are from South America and Southern Asia, with the rest being from the anglosphere.
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>>2837 >black female (please no racism;) webm related though other than this you're quite normal for genz. You know, the introverts are the majority now, awkward socialness is the default, feeling deficient and useless is common now. 4chan "won" after all
>This entire post. This post reeks of 4chan /r9gay/. I can tell by your posting style that you're not around these parks. You also probably should have put this in the vent or /girltalk/ thread instead. Stop pitying yourself and acting like a sperg. Try to improve on your faults to the best of your ability, even if it takes you a while. Start slow, build up. >I want to pay my parents back, pay college debts, and become a hikikomori with my cat. You can't do all these things at once. Why go to college and get into a lot of debt if you just want to eventually become a hikki in the end? Choose one. Prioritize. Remember, a remote job position isn't the same as being a hikki. Hikkis are NEETs who almost never leave their room. >I feel extremely unloved because I’m unlovable and always have been. Peers, strangers, and teachers have thought I was mentally retarded with Down syndrome in school and would make fun of me constantly. It was just verbal bullying with a few physical mishaps like pushing and tripping, but it’s still giving me issues mentally (lifelong most likely). Does your cat love you? Does your family love you? If they bother enough to take care of you they probably do to an extent. So you are capable of having others love you. But regardless, you should be focusing on loving yourself rather than having others love you. If you don't love yourself, then make yourself into a person that you can love. While I say that, it's also best not to be too hard on yourself. I say that if your trying your best, even if your not exactly the ideal person you want to be, then you should love yourself for doing the best you possibly can for yourself. I want to add that it's best to have people who are truly genuinely loyal to you, and who really do care, rather than people who only care for you in the moment. To put it simply, it's better to have a select few people who truly love you rather than 'friends' who only are with you during times that are best suited to them. Make sure to value the others that love you as well. It also appears that you know some Japanese based on my reading of this thread. Why not start a side gig translating doujins and artworks? You can make a nice buck doing that.
>>2857 嘘じゃなさそうだが十二年で「ペラペラじゃない」とはどういう事だ?俺は三年しか学んでないが流暢だ。日本人並みじゃないにせよ、日本語能力試験で一級を簡単に合格する自信がある。 それか?教科書から学んでいるってやつ? >>2859 >Whatever you do you should translate on the side and invest or save the profits. >>2868 >Why not start a side gig translating doujins and artworks? You can make a nice buck doing that. What I would like to know is how to translate for money without selling my soul to some cancerous "community" that only exists within Discuck or using a shitty freelance platform that sucks me dry of personal data.
>>2869 I've seen it done a few ways. LN translators slap on a patreon, paypal, rarely a crypto wallet, and offer bonus translated chapters for x amount donated. Patreon is probably the more important one there as it's subscription based and the average person can't be assed to cancel a subscription. If you favor the doujin/manga approach instead you can slap your donation options on the translator page. I've also heard sadpanda has bounties, but I've never learned if those are for actual money or some sort of internet points. I'm sure there are plenty of other ways to monetize it if you're inventive enough. Sadly, community nonsense and shitcord generally means more profit. People seem to be more willing to throw money at those attached to them, sometimes repeatedly, for reasons I do not understand.
>>2869 Discuck is the norm nowadays so I don't know what to tell you. Perhaps due what >>2870 says or go to an alternative service like element or irc. I know that those aren't heavily populated, but you got to start somewhere.
>>2857 そんな若い時から初めてにしてはたいしたことないな。さすが黒人の無能。
>>2868 >reeks of /r9k/ get on with the times grandpa, all the cool kids are in crystalcafe now. Now with 30% more shitposts. Self pity and cycles of guilt is most common today, even more prevalent than tumblr now that whole world's like this. No worry about that but problem arises when people keep on stagnating and avoiding the hardships. Starting small might be the hardest thing unless you yourself internalize that "yes doing this is from my own will, not from outside, and failing to do it is alright" Atleast then you've developed to generate your will to do more things. Of course there is no set way to follow, just having all the ways others have used will clear your mind. Only your path you forged will work out for you. >>2869 you can trawl on cuck/jpn/ or smug/a/ to find some TL groups but yeah many will ask to join discuck for your "test" and works. Other option would be finding at mango sites where they mention on their newest releases that they want a translator/typesetter
>>2870 I consider Patreon and PayPal to be shitty datamining freelance platforms. Cryptocurrencies would be the best option in a perfect world, but most dekinais who would actually pay for translations either have never heard of them or have only heard of (((Bitcoin))).
>>2873 >crystalcafe literally the female version of /r9k/ but without troons. It's filled to the brim with GenZed normals who browse twitter all day and terrible jannies who are extremely banhappy. As much as I hate wizchad, it is way better than any female iteration of the same type of imageboard (gender-exclusive). >No worry about that but problem arises when people keep on stagnating and avoiding the hardships. Starting small might be the hardest thing unless you yourself internalize that "yes doing this is from my own will, not from outside, and failing to do it is alright" Atleast then you've developed to generate your will to do more things. Of course there is no set way to follow, just having all the ways others have used will clear your mind. Only your path you forged will work out for you. Good advice anon. Very wise.
>>2872 >そんな若い時から初めてにしてはたいしたことないな。さすが黒人の無能 You’re a piece of shit, just so you know dumb cunt. Most blacks don’t know how to do much of anything, so this means literally nothing to me.
>>2872 目を噛んで死ね、くそがき
>>2837 Have you tried becoming forklift certified?
>>2853 I've lost 2 years to the CS meme so far, but I've actually learned a lot. Even if I can't turn it into a profession due to my own incompetence, I've already acquired a fun hobby.
>>2843 truth
>>2857 t. 嘘つき
>>2883 Don’t care what you think about it. I know I’m telling the truth, racist chink. もう地獄に行け
このスレッドはとても攻撃的です...
>>2884 地獄へ落ちろ*
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>>2875 Checking out crystalcafe, it horrifyingly amazing how well the tumblr demographic has adapted to imageboard. Its like exactly what you've described as - female r9k, with a mix of standard girly stuff. Yet every post you see has a distinct disdain attached to it, like you'd see in kiwifarms or twitter drama, a slight tinge of tryhardness anger for a lack of better words. And ofcourse kpop threads.
>>2878 通常の黒人よりできてよかったねw
>>2889 ハードル低っw
>i m n o t l i k e e v e r y o t h e r g i r l >no social skills and dead end job >implying you need social skills as a female or that you'll ever want to or have to provide for anyone >I feel extremely unloved because the only people who will talk to me are losers irl and losers on imageboards Why do you guys genuinely respond to posts like these?
>>2845 >The pussy pass thing… that was… a pretty weird thing to say anyway Not really, it's called perspective. Men who feel unloved and lonely need to create extrinsic value through sheer will. Women have intrinsic biological value. That doesn't necessarily diminish your depression or your discontent with how your life has turned out, but when you're on a forum that is almost entirely comprised of jaded men in their late 20's you're going to get that perspective. How people have treated you the past doesn't really matter. All that matters are the things you value or desire out of life and whether or not you can achieve them. Do you actually care about having a successful career or education? Or do you just want intimacy? You say you want to be a hikkimori so I assume you just feel obligated to get an education rather than actually desiring some career path. If all you desire is to NEET it up and get social validation I can't imagine that would actually be difficult in the age of dating websites and apps. Also as others have said, 19 is ridiculously young. You are still very much mentally a retarded child.
>>2891 Even with the high chance that the OP is 100% shitposting giving advice in a public forum might actually help a lurker who didn't ask for it. I think the off chance of that happening is worth the few minutes it takes to play along.
>>2893 This. OP sounds like a cuckchanner and should be ignored for posting without lurking, but since so many people replied to this thread, it can be seen as a good thread for someone looking for advice.
>>2846 I thought it was all white dudes.
>>2899 I thought we were all bolivian and puerto ricans
>>2892 > If all you desire is to NEET it up and get social validation >retarded Coming from you.
>>2918 I don't understand what you're trying to say.
>>2892 The fact that you think I want social validation by being a NEET is what makes you retarded. Your advice is shit, just like everyone else’s, especially the pussy shit, you gross fag. You’re probably in your 50s, and this shitsite is just like 4chan, so I don’t know why you chucks think you’re better than 4chan, bud. >>2889 Better than bring a racist white cunt, like yourself. >>2891 >I m n o t l i k e e v e r y o t h e r g i r l Don’t go around saying stuff you don’t know the meaning of, chief. Don’t go around throwing phrases into the air so it can lose its meaning. Just so you retarded cunt-fags know, I’m not replying or reading your shit anymore. Bye. ここには人種差別主義者のアメリカの白人だけだから、白人のことがもっと嫌いになった。おめでとう。今から、全部白人が大嫌いだ。>>>地獄に行け<<<
>>2891 The same reasoning these two posts elaborate on: >>2893 >>2897, essentially to provide genuine advice and information to people who could need it regardless of whether or not the OP was being honest. Also because it's fun to pretend there are girls on the internet. >>2920 I'm not sure if you really are the OP or not but that's maybe the most passive aggressive way you could have responded. >Just so you retarded cunt-fags know, I’m not replying or reading your shit anymore. Bye. The entire purpose of making a thread is to garner replies for information and meaning. It's odd (but not uncommon) to ask for help, then get angry when people answer you truthfully.
>>2920 >The fact that you think I want social validation by being a NEET is what makes you retarded That's not what I wrote, you need to work on your reading comprehension. I wrote that the only desires I could extract from the OP was that you wanted to be a NEET and wanted to "feel loved". You probably think everyone's advice is shit because you can't actually parse what people are saying. >and this shitsite is just like 4chan, so I don’t know why you chucks think you’re better than 4chan, bud. Uh, okay?
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is this you OP?
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I'm pretty sure >>2920 is real. If not he does a convincing job. I enjoyed it. >Just so you retarded cunt-fags know, I’m not replying or reading your shit anymore. >Bye.
I want to die everyday the world doesn't want me and I really don't want much of it. Everything is so boring only few things bring me joy that I do but why is it so hard to start new to get back into the world once you found that thing you like in life seems like its only a fair tale that will never happen.
>>2905 I thought we were all Whelsh, like me.


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